I’m 26. I first attempted suicide at 13. In the years in between, I got an Oxford degree and a Masters in psychiatric research; I made a bunch of fab friends; I met my lovely partner.

I spent a year in a psychiatric unit. I spent another summer in hospital. I tried CBT, IPT, and psychoanalysis. I tried prozac, paroxetine, venlafaxine, reboxetine. I tried fish oils and lightboxes and 5-htp. I tried acupuncture and reflexology and yoga. I tried vitamins and diets and exercise. I tried working to escape from the past. I tried giving everything up to face the past. I tried industrial quantities of chocolate to cheer me up; industrial quantities of vodka to help me forget; industrial quantities of sleeping tablets to paralyse me into staying put. The only constant was suicide.

This is DBT. I need this to work and I’m giving it everything.